Monday, May 18, 2009

The Truth about Lying-Honest! (Update)

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Kate: A healthy person is someone who expresses what they're feeling inside. Express, not repress.

Luc: In that case, you must be one of the healthiest people in the world.

Most of you have seen probably seen the movie, French Kiss. Below, I have posted a slightly exaggerated but funny scene on cultural differences that relates to a kind of "truth." Kate (Meg Ryan) is telling the charmingly cunning and slightly infatuated Frenchman Luc (Keven Kline) that her facial expressions have to match her emotions. Why do I find her sincerity amusing? I think that most of my life, I have been this American type as well...maybe you are too? Perhaps, I fool myself when I think I have absorbed Puerto Rican culture enough to maintain a strategically neutral face. (I secretly think that Puerto Ricans and the French people have a lot in common when it comes to customer service. Perdoname!)

Watch the short scene above

I believe in emotional honesty but tempered with a kindness that fits the situation. For example, truth that hurts sometimes has a hidden motive. I much prefer to hear "You haven't gained any weight" than "What happened? You were sooooo thin!" Why am I thinking about what honesty means?

Linda of Vulture Peak Muse bestowed this clever, "You've been through a lot" (my re-name) award upon me a couple of weeks ago but I haven't been able to address the requirements. I know that the award is for writing with honesty and is given to those who share their life experiences in writing. After receiving this award, Linda took on the challenge and wrote an incredibly honest account of her life but later deleted it. I know how she feels, it's a personal risk to be honest. Sometimes, I think I over-share here at Oasis Writing Link but I've come to accept this aspect of my personality. I love truth in writing-especially when it involves personal emotional risk. I admire people who can accept themselves so well that they are willing to share openly-flaws and all. Of course, everyone has their own understanding of honesty. With that in mind, I will proceed with posting the rules and fulfilling the requirements of this Honest Scrap Award:


Hi friends, just a bit of self-interruption to tell all of you that Reveda the sweet dimpled baby gave me this award, too. I just found it thanks to Braja. Love to you sweet baby and everyone go over there and look at her darling face.


The rules of this award are:
1.You must brag about the award.
2.You must include the name of the blogger who bestowed the award on you and link back to the blogger.
3.You must choose a minimum of seven (7) blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.
4.Show their names and links and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with Honest Weblog
5.List at least ten (10) honest things about yourself.

Ten Honest Things About Myself

1. I enjoy writing and would like to finish my dissertation this summer so that I could write in another style with a more personal focus.

2. I'm extremely attached to my daughter and am secretly suffering yet pleased that she has a desire to go off to study far away from me.

3.When I was a child, I wanted to be an artist. I must still have this desire because I surround myself with artistic type people and both of my children study the arts. (music and painting)

4.I also wanted to be a go-go girl -dancer-until my father spoke to me quite strongly, "Being a go-go girl is not a career!" He was so serious and harsh that I realized I might not know what being a go-go girl meant.

5. I'm highly conscious of maintaining healthy lifestyle but also drink! (I'm convinced that Puerto Rican coffee is the best coffee in the world and I cannot resist it.

6. I have a vivid memory of people, the past and emotions. When I want to recall an experience-my own or something I read/viewed, I see a picture in my mind and emotions are drawn to the I remember novels I read as a child or young person but not necessarily the author's name or the name of the book. The visual image connected to emotion is alive in my mind...also emotional expressions on people's faces.

7. I avoided taking math at the university; when it was time to graduate, I had to study independently and pass a math competency exam. If I did not pass the exam, I couldn't graduate. The third and final attempt was successful.

8. I have a tendency to worry, which makes me ultra careful about exposing myself to news of all types. Nevertheless, I am completely open to personal sharing and other "real" stories, and consider it an honor when people trust me enough to share.

9. (related to # 8) I have been a "counselor" (career, college, prison) many times and look at all my life interactions in this manner.

10. When I was 20 years old, I climbed to the top of the beautiful Blarney Castle in Killarney, Ireland, leaned back (hung upside down) while my sister, Pamala, held my feet and kissed the Blarney Stone. From that point on, I was blessed with the gift of eloquence and I have a certificate to prove it!

The last requirement:
Then pass it on with the instructions!

1. Colleen's My Journey to Ironman. (She has an incredible way of making a contribution to the world health.)

2. Ms. Lucy of Enchanted by Josephine

3. Natalie of Musings from the Deep

4. Julie of Tangobaby

5. Paris of Remembering Paris

6. Braja of Lost and Found in India

7. Michelle of The Truth as I Know it

Now imagine that you are listening to Billy Joel singing "Honesty" since "they" won't give permission to embed the You Tube!


  1. Oh wow. Thank you Cynthia!

    Funnily enough, I just wrote a post about honesty today...or lying....or both really :)


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  3. What a great post Cynthia...You really deserve this award sweets. I like your 10 things about self.

    I love your blog. I am often in awe of how you handle difficult subjects...both personal and in general...I see you have some great spaces where you are giving awards. I know a few of these blogs. I will check out each one...because I know you have a gift in recognizing good blogs
    Love and hugs

  4. Honesty about ourselves is easy, it's our truth. Being honest with others is multi layered. I think that's one of the reasons I'm a therapist I've never been shy of telling it how it is. And if people come to therapy they are coming cause they want to change, and if i can help someone learn to feel good about themselves then I've done a good job.
    I write my blog for a place to show my truth.

  5. I enjoyed this very much Cynthia!The Blarnry Stone huh?
    ~ Carol ~

  6. Honesty is one of my all time faves too! We must have the same taste in music. Thank you for the award, Cynthia. :D
    I enjoyed your answers very much. Hugs to you.xx♥

  7. You are sweet, thank you so much...
    I actually enjoyed (for a change!) reading those ten things about you, and loved that you kissed the Blarney Stone!

  8. Oh my goodness,Thank You so much...I would have never guessed. It's so wonderful to be thought of in this way. I'm honoured:)

  9. Go-go dancer!
    Well, that was quite a surprise.
    Not really a career choice with a great future but might have been fun for a little while.
    Maybe writing is a better choice for you.
    Have a lovely week.

  10. Honesty and there is a big subject Cynthia. There is the truth and then there are lies and in the middle is what I call the gentle truth. There is never any excuse worthy of a lie but sometimes we need the gentle truth, xv.

  11. Cynthia, you so deserve this award! I love the honesty in your writing. I, too, wear my emotions on my face (and do not hide them well even when I really must) that why I prefer to keep the image of me off the www? I think my introversion prevents me from sharing many personal things on my blog, but I think it is a good way to live, personally!


  12. Thank you for the award, Cynthia! I am very honored that you chose me! I will have to do some thinking about what to write about myself now. But it will be a good subject for me to write on today as a Sunday and my rest day.

  13. Until today, every time I have visited your space here, your site shut down on me repeatedly. I have no idea why so I am typing fast just in case it happens again.

    First, I love Meg Ryan in anything. There is a certain emotional honesty to her acting. Especially when she is teamed up with Tom Hanks. As far as being honest using facial expressions, I would get clobbered. I'm like an open book especially when I am uspset or angry. Thanks for sharing this, it was a wonderful read.

  14. you really kissed the blarney stone the right way!!! that is very impressive, cynthia!!!

    I loved reading more about you, that's what I love about these little awards and yes, I did delete the second part of my post to this an explanation, I had an unsavory comment and it felt best for me...loved your post on this, thank you for participating...I will be sure to read your participants answers ;)

    blessings to you...

  15. Friends, I`ve had a difficult day and have been trying hard not to show it on my face! Reading these comments has brought authentic joy to my expression...your comments are delightful! Thank you all so much. Love to you <3

  16. I love how open and honest you are about yourself. When I write I mentally picture Mr FF leaning over my shoulder saying ' don't give away so much personal stuff' and he tempers my naturally incautious tendencies. Left to my own devices you'd all know everything about me from the day I was born.

    sorry you've had a difficult day - let's hope tomorrow is better

  17. Cynthia, honey, you just got ANOTHER one at Reveda's...go and visit that little Queen of the Babies :)

  18. I admire how open and honest you are, C. I've sometimes been criticized for being too honest, which always amazes me. If that is the case then I am harboring a million secrets!
    The math thing - Oh, I had to go to summer school for failing Algebra 1, which left me with too few credits to pass to 12th grade. I had a fabulous teacher who made algebra seem like a game and I finished with an A. Perhaps they should have sent my original Math teacher to summer school to learn how to recognize the different needs of her students. It was a wonderful learning experience.
    Good to back visiting you again! Have missed you.
    Catherine xx

  19. Emotional honesty – what a great theme! I enjoyed the film clip as I love both of those actors. They show that acting is more than words.

    I lack a poker face and tend to be honest to a fault, but that’s just who I am. It sounds like you’ve come to terms with who you are too. If you can’t be honest in YOUR blog where else can you be? Keep being yourself.

  20. Michelle, thanks for reading. When I checked your blog, I read about the overlooked and underattended daughter. Your're children really stand up for themselves and that's important. Love to you <3
    Linda,thank you for your comments and the kind sentiment you share with me. I think that honesty is definately present in your blog as well. Love to you <3

  21. Firebyrd, that comment got away from me!! Yes, I'm sure that in your profession, honesty is a huge concern. Thank you for reading and commenting. I hope that your son is well soon. Take care <3
    Carol,yes and it was stone cold!
    Love to you!<3

    Natalie,your blog certainly expresses your honesty and your heart. I know that this award was given to you a long time ago, dear friend. Love to you <3

    Braja, I surprised that so many people have heard of the Blarney Stone. It has some myth making potential. Love to you <3

    Ms.Lucy, hi friend, yes, of course you are honest. You share your book reviews and life from the heart! Love to you. <3

    Elizabeth, I'm afraid that the go-go phase lasted a while...I remember dancing to Wipe Out! and just going crazy! I have it on film (35m black and white) I think I was a bit too into it! ha love to you <3

    Vicki,yes, I agree with you. Angry truth is quite often self-serving and hurtful. Thank you for reading. Love to you. <3

    Kim, I think of you as honest in your writing and comments. I was surprised to read that you consider yourself introverted. I also like quiet time...maybe you are an introverted extrovert? Your art is your extended honest expression. Love to you <3

    Colleen,I look forward to reading your post. I will go check now to see. I think your goal is admirable and I hope that many nets are bought as a result of your efforts. <3

    Bogey, I'm sorry about your being sent off to cyberspace! What a shame. I hope the problem is clear now because I've taken off some features...I think when you have so much extra 'stuff' it overwhelms some computers. I guess the Japanese singer has to go...Yes, you are the honest type, too. You don't even hide it! ha Thank you for reading! <3

    Linda,gosh, what could anyone say...sometimes people hurt each other unnecessarily and then we close down...for a while. I think I do that too.

    I like the idea of writing and sharing...and then later when it no longer seems zap it into cyberspace forever. It's a bit of freedom! Love to you <3

    French Fancy, thanks for sharing! Yes, you are honest with your thoughts and feelings...but I guess Mr. FF wants to insure your to you. <3

    Braja,that you sweetie for the notification...I updated my post to include that sweet little baby. Love to you <3

    Catherine,thank you, friend. I am glad to have you back from the sea-your wonderful inspiring vacation. Thanks for sharing your math terrors, too. Now that they are in the past...they are a bit funny? I hope we both don't carry any scars...:-) It's good to connect with you...I love your honest sharing in your comments, too! Love to you. <3

    Sarah, thank you for your visit, and yes, you are lively and honest in all of your writing. I have been enjoying all the surprises at your blog, especially, your childhood journal, your daughter's review, and the recent teen author mentoring idea. Thanks for commenting here at OWL blog! Love to you <3


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